In Teen Wolf’s midseason finale, “Status Asthamaticus,” we finally get some answers to our burning questions. Well, one of them, anyway. We learned the answer to the question, “What is Deputy Parrish?” Turns out, he’s a Hellhound. Now we just have to determine his nature. Though a Hellhound is a flaming hound that guards the supernatural, he’s still a dog at heart. So we’re pretty certain Parrish will be vindicated as a good boy. Oh, and we learned one other important thing in “Status Asthmaticus”—that Melissa McCall is all kinds of awesome.
Though the audience didn’t find out much that was new beyond Parrish’s supernatural identity, Scott’s pack had their collective minds blown by Theo. After half a season pretending to be a good guy in order to ingratiate himself with the pack, Theo blows his cover in a series of reveals to Lydia, Scott, Malia, Stiles, and Mason (he’s part of the inner circle now, right?). Who knew Theo was such a drama queen? The Dread Doctors were probably thinking, “You see what we’ve had to put up with all this time?” Though they did show up at a nightclub with a harpoon once, so the Dread Doctors must not be too adverse to theatrics. The question remains, why did Theo spend all that time getting everyone to trust him, only to expose himself as an evil coyote liar? If his plan was to get them in touch with their more sinister sides so they would embrace him as their Dark Lord, it didn’t seem to take. Perhaps he just couldn’t restrain his evil urge to gloat any longer.
“Status Asthmaticus” had a lot going on, some of it admittedly hard to track. The pack was isolated from each other much of the time, while Theo was everywhere. Though Theo has loudly declared himself, there is still a lot of mystery around the Dread Doctors, including what they want with La Bête. Everybody had their hands full in the action-packed “Status Asthmaticus,” so much so that it took a death before anyone could catch their breath.
Just another Crisis-Filled Day in Beacon Hills
In the fast-paced, cliffhanger style of Season 5, “Status Asthmaticus” begins where “Lies of Omission” left off: Hayden in the midst of chimera failure. Despite Liam’s pleas, Scott is unwilling to give Hayden the bite because he believes it will kill her. Could it really be because Hayden is annoying and Scott doesn’t need another angry, impulsive beta? Hmm … probably not. Scott tells Liam they need to find another way. Theo unhelpfully adds, “Guys, I don’t know the statistics for surviving a werewolf bite, but she’s definitely not surviving this. We need to do something.” If Theo wants Hayden to be turned, we can’t help but think it’s a bad idea. Scott does what anyone in his shoes would do: he calls his mom. Well, she is a nurse, and she is in the supernatural secret club. Mrs. McCall tries to treat Hayden with chelation therapy to remove the mercury from her blood. Liam is having a hard time keeping his cool. Scott tells her, “It’s the full moon. We can feel it even during the day. And it’s a Supermoon.” Apparently the supermoon will make them super strong and super aggressive. Super.
The Sheriff’s department is dealing with their own emergency, because a huge shapeshifter is loose in Beacon Hills. The deputies radio in about it loping through the streets, going from being quadrupedal to bipedal. As Deputy Clark nears the creature by the high school, it attacks, flipping her car. Clark escapes into the high school, because BHHS is always so safe. Sheriff Stilinski finds Clark at the school, where they see that the creature has destroyed a hallway. Unbeknownst to Stilinski and Clark, the Dread Doctors stand behind them watching. Creepy. The Pathologist asks, “Success?” and the Surgeon answers, “Imminent.”
Scott and Theo share a bro heart-to-heart as Mrs. McCall treats Hayden. Theo tells Scott that he needs his pack tonight, but Scott isn’t sure he has a pack anymore. What’s with the self-pity, Scott? Theo offers to talk to them. Scott is grateful to his new, secretly evil, BFF.
Sharing is Caring
Lydia is hanging out with Deputy Parrish, who has locked himself in a cell at the Sheriff’s office. Parrish tells Lydia to go home, but he doesn’t seem to mean it. Parrish asks her if it helps her to know what she is. It doesn’t scare her as much, now that she knows that she’s a banshee. Parrish admits he thought he was going to die the night he found the werewolf with the talons because he saw a vision of Lydia. She remembers the storm that occurred that night, and how Kira told her the story of the Wild Hunt—ghostriders arriving during a storm with black dogs. We didn’t even think Kira was listening to her parents that night. It’s surprising she then relayed this tale to Lydia. Lydia abruptly tells him she needs to check something out and leaves the station.
Stiles’ Jeep seems to have finally given up. Malia picks Stiles up after the Jeep is towed. Check out her fancy driving skills. She didn’t even go into a trance. In regards to fixing his Jeep, Stiles tells Malia, “There’s not enough duct tape in the world to fix that thing.” He lists all its problems.
Malia: “How come you let it get so bad?”
Scott: “There’s been a few distractions, if you haven’t noticed.”
Malia: “I notice. More than you think I do.”
We hope this isn’t supposed to be a metaphor for their relationship. Stiles tells Malia to drop him off at the station so he can talk to his dad. Malia asks if he’s going to tell his dad about Donovan. Stiles is surprised she knows.
Malia: “I didn’t matter to me. That’s why I never said anything.”
Stiles: “It matters to me.”
We sure hope they don’t break up. But then again, perhaps Malia deserves better than a distracted, self-loathing boyfriend who’s still crushing on another girl.
At the animal clinic, the chelation treatment isn’t helping Hayden. She’s getting worse. Hayden wants them to find her sister Valerie (Deputy Clark). Theo has texted Scott to tell him that there’s a lot of police cars at the high school, indicating there could be another chimera. Scott heads to the school to find Hayden’s sister. Later, after Scott has left, Mrs. McCall and Liam notice more marks on Hayden. Liam says, “She’s getting worse, isn’t she?” She agrees, telling him that she needs to take Hayden to the hospital to try to treat her there. Hayden doesn’t appear to be on the road to recovery.
Lydia has gone to the school library to check the bestiary. She looks up the entry on the Wild Hunt. The description reads: “Woden’s Hunt, also known as the Wild Ride or Wild Hunt. A myth of devilish riders in the sky accompanied by black dogs, spectral beasts whose eyes glowed with fire. A Bearer of Death and Guardian of the Supernatural, the black dog is also known by its more common name … The Hellhound.” If these Beacon Hills kids could manage to read a book, she probably could’ve read the entire bestiary earlier and saved them all a lot of trouble. Lydia has a banshee moment and realizes someone’s going to die in the library. So much death amongst the stacks. Theo sneaks up on Lydia. He tells her she can’t tell anyone about her premonition, “Because I want you, Lydia. I want all of you.” She doesn’t understand his weird, cryptic statement. Theo tells Lydia he’ll give her some time to think about it, then knocks her out. What a jerk!
Malia is in the cave that she lived in as a coyote. An animal enters the cave and we’re worried it’s the Desert Wolf coming for her daughter. But it turns out to be Theo, who transforms into a [naked] human right before Malia’s eyes. Theo offers to show Malia how to transform, and she responds, “You’re showing me plenty.” Malia is our only comic relief this season. Theo knows she’s planning on killing her mother, and offers to help. Theo points out that if Scott can’t help them, then someone else needs to take the lead. Theo tells Lydia that Hayden’s being moved to the hospital, and that there are two more chimeras that need to be found. Is she falling for this? Seems like Malia would be too loyal for this kind of pack mutiny talk.
Stiles is at the Sheriff’s station waiting for his dad when he hears the fire alarm going off. Parrish is still in the cell, but he goes all orange-eyed, bends the cell bars, and escapes. The other deputies are surprisingly quick to pull their guns on their co-worker, but Stiles tells them to let Parrish go. Good thing the boss’s son is here to tell them what to do. Parrish finds the body of the most recently killed chimera and drives away with it. Stiles begins to follow Parrish.
Mrs. McCall, Liam, and Hayden have arrived at the hospital. Hayden is worsening and asks for her sister again. It’s pretty heartbreaking. Can’t someone just call the Sheriff’s station already?
Scott arrives at the library looking for Lydia, after receiving a text from her phone. Scott looks at his phone and sees a series of angry texts from Liam, which he ignores. Scott manages to finds her phone, but no signs of Lydia. What he does see are signs of mountain ash in the library. Theo is there waiting for him. Scott realizes Theo is a chimera. Theo tells Scott he’s part coyote, which is why Malia instinctively trusted him first. Theo was the first chimera, though he wasn’t a perfect success. Theo turns on the telluric current generator, which means Scott can’t use his cell phone. Doesn’t the library have a landline? He tells Scott he will have to wait for the supermoon to see what comes next.
Scott tries to escape the library with no success. He goes to the roof to try to get past the mountain ash. Scott crushes his inhaler and realizes it has wolfsbane in it, which is why he’s been so wimpy lately. Liam shows up on the roof to challenge his alpha. It’s not clear how he got past the mountain ash, but apparently Theo let him in. Liam’s angry that Scott won’t bite Hayden. Scott points out the supermoon is making him more aggressive. Liam responds, “You’re gonna keep your promise. Even if it kills you,” and attacks Scott. Liam and Scott fight, landing back inside the library. Scott says, “Don’t do this, Liam. I can’t let you kill me,” and he transforms. Their werewolf-on-werewolf violence continues.
Mason is at the hospital helping Mrs. McCall as she desperately tries to save Hayden. As Hayden worsens, Mrs. McCall tells Mason he needs to get Liam: “If Liam wants to be with her, he needs to get her now because she is dying. And I don’t know what else to do.”
Malia has found one of the chimeras, who is drinking out of a blood bag. That’s unpleasant. Malia and the chimera begin to fight. The chimera seems to gain the upper hand, but then Braeden, who we haven’t seen since Season 4, shows up with some kind of current-generating gun and scares him off. Braeden asks, “What the hell was that?” Guess someone’s got to get the mercenary in the chimera loop. It turns out that Braeden has come to town to warn Malia that her mother knows about her plan and she’s coming back to Beacon Hills.
Meanwhile Parrish is still on body disposal duty and Stiles has been watching him. Stiles calls Theo for help. Stiles wants to tell Scott, but Theo says that Scott doesn’t want to talk to him. Theo adds, “But I think your dad does,” and flashes Stiles’ library ID. Somehow, Stiles realizes this means that Theo’s been lying, though we’re not sure how. Stiles asks where his dad is and if Theo has hurt him. Theo ignores his questions because he has a villain speech he wants to give:
“I never lied about why I came to Beacon Hills. I’m here for a pack. I came for the werecoyote. The one whose first instinct is to kill. I came for the Banshee, the girl surrounded by death. I came for the dark Kitsune, the Beta with anger issues … I came for Void Stiles. That’s the pack I want. Unfortunately, it doesn’t include Scott.”
Theo says he will tell Stiles where his dad is being held if he promises not to help Scott. Scott punches Theo. Theo seems to appreciate Stiles’ outburst. The villain speech continues:
“There he is! That’s Void Stiles. It felt good, didn’t it? We won’t tell Scott. ‘Cause you can’t lose your best friend, right? Even though we both know you never needed him. You hate me now, but you’ll get it eventually. This is the hard part. ‘Cause you can’t help Scott and save your dad’s life. You’ve still got time, Stiles. You’ve still got time.”
At the library, Scott tells Liam that Theo is using him, that Theo needs Liam to become the alpha because Theo can’t take Scott’s power on his own. But once Liam does, Theo will take it from him. Liam is too amped up to listen.
Back at the hospital, neither Hayden’s sister nor Liam have arrived. Mrs. McCall holds Hayden’s hand as she dies. It’s a very sad scene that reminds us that Mrs. McCall is a healer, but a mother first.
Liam is about to kill Scott when Mason runs into the library. He yells at Liam to stop. When Liam finally relents, Mason tells him that Hayden just died a few minutes ago. Liam immediately rushes back to the hospital. We’re still not sure how he’s getting past the mountain ash. Scott’s in pretty bad shape. Mason asks him what happened, but before he can respond Theo arrives, saying “I mean, seriously. You couldn’t have waited five minutes?” and knocks out Mason.
Theo: “I should’ve stayed. I should’ve made sure.”
Scott: “Because now you have to kill me yourself. They’re still mine.”
Theo: “Maybe not yet, but they’ll come around.”
Scott: “Not for you. They’re not like you. They never will be.”
Theo: “Because I’m a chimera? Because I’m not a real werewolf?”
Scott: “Because you’re barely even human.”
Theo charges him and puts his claws in Scott’s chest, killing him.
Stiles finds his dad, still alive. Parrish comes for Hayden, and Liam lets him take her body. Mrs. McCall runs into the library and begins to resuscitate Scott. Mason tells her that Scott hasn’t had a heartbeat for 15 minutes, but Scott’s mom doesn’t give up. She pounds on his chest and Scott roars to life.
After his miraculous recovery, Scott and his mom recover at home. He tells her he’s lost his pack. She responds that every leader suffers loss, sometimes more than seems bearable, but that he can still offer them hope.
The day is not going as Theo had hoped and he’s not happy. He storms into the Clinic of Horrors, where Lydia lies on the floor. Theo uses the clawtap method to access her memories in order to find out where Parrish has been taking the chimeras. He takes some of the green liquid from the Dread Doctors’ favorite experiment. Theo drags Lydia out to the Nemeton and starts injecting the dead chimera with the green liquid. The chimeras begin to wake from the dead. They appear confused and ask what’s happening and who he is. Theo responds, “I’m your alpha. And all of you … all of you belong to me.” Lydia watches from the forest floor as the chimeras begin to follow after Theo.
Finally, the Dread Doctors are smashing a wall in one of their secret locations. As they chant, “La Bête (the beast),” they uncover an image of two supernatural creatures fighting. The last reference to La Bête du Gêvaudan in Teen Wolf was in Season 1 when Kate Argent told her niece Allison that the beast had killed over a hundred people in 1766 and was eventually killed by one of the Argent ancestors. What do the Dread Doctors want with the Beast? We don’t know, but it probably doesn’t involve candy and sunshine for everyone.
“Status Asthamaticus” didn’t answer many of our questions, but how fun was it to see Theo’s plans fail? Now the pack can see how evil Theo really is, but it’s not clear what they will do about it. What will Theo do with his chimera pack? Will they go to school and try to fit in? Will they ever clean the silver off their faces? We’re eager to find out what this zombie chimera pack will do and how the Dread Doctors plan to use the beast.
We’ve been running at breakneck speed all Season 5 and wonder when the writers will give us some respite by slowing it down and bringing back the humor and more interesting interaction between characters. Though it was filled with excitement and suspense, the midseason finale left us with more questions than answers. And now we have to wait until January 2016 before Teen Wolf gives us some answers. “Status Asthamaticus” was entertaining, but provided unsatisfying end to the first half of Teen Wolf’s Season 5.